Prose, random thought, realization, writing

Holding to the old …

The new year celebrations are over for likes of me – specifically for the people of my age. The religious calendar followed at my home differs though. It will be on fourteenth that the month of kharmas ( inauspicious days as per Hindu astrological calculations) will be over. January fourteenth marks the accepted and expected end of winters in my part of the country. This will be celebrated by a bonfire , festive dinner menu and passing gifts to the loved ones , prayers to the local gods for new crop etc

January musings

I have never before paid attention to these rituals in the house , except for arranging gifts assigned to me and making sure that essential snacks are ordered online and delivered on the mentioned date. Me and husband will wait for my mother-in-law to prepare the sweets and once it has been offered to the gods , it will be given to the people in the house. This year it’s not much different but I feel compelled to honor the traditions and to know about them more. I have a sudden urge to be a part of the celebrations of my religion and to make them a part of my own life , without feeling like a guest.

This January came with news of moving away from my family and to have a new start in a faraway city. This month just got a completely different meaning for me in terms of new year , new month , new life perhaps. And I seek to know my roots better , before this shift. I wish I had more time to treasure all that I have taken for granted so far.

new chapter begins

the leaves become the roots

new flowers from old ..

*****

{This is my attempt at a haibun after years so I admit I am way out of practice for the form.}

Linked to Dverse Poets and Colleen’s Tanka Tuesday

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Myself, Prose, writing

A little better everyday ..

Yesterday was not a happy day. And it was not happy ’cause I stressed about things that should not even matter. I was snappy and irritated and it all accumulated in a bad headache by the end of the day.

I am very anxious about a change I see happening in my life and as much as it is a very exciting ( a post on that as soon as I have more details ) for the work scene , I feel scared. Not for my work but for the fact that I am a worrier most of the days and I think I am just being too nervous. ( Perhaps, I never would be ).

At the end of the day, when I looked at myself in the mirror , I was not surprised to see myself look so tired and dull. But then, my habit to impose positive thoughts kicked in. And I said , I see potential there. I did not want to see myself as a victim of my moods but someone who let my emotions take a toll on me and learned the lesson. I was suddenly looking at a person ready to do better next day.

So I wrote this post , to gather all my positive vibes and strength and blessings in a single sentence –

I can do better.

And I will.

And I did ( a little better than yesterday atleast )

My thoughts last night were to sleep with a affirmative feeling about myself and that I am being guided by God on a path that’s best for me. Sooner or later , it will be all for a good reason. I just have to pick the pieces from my side and not make any excuses to be a better Me.

 

Linked this post to Nurturing Thursday and Friday reflections.

Prose, random thought

Be prepared to change

Offlate I am talking to a lot of people in office and outside about what they want to do and how they plan to go about it. Most times people have much dreams and aspirations to make money but not the will to work for it. How can one expect to stay comfortable and still make progress?

It is also foolish when you decide not to let yourself be stagnate or your knowledge be rusted. The ever moving economy and dynamics of work demands one to be on your feet and walking in same stride as with the business needs. Ask not what the company can do for you , but what have you done to help your cause first. If you keep doing the current work best without planning for next step, there would be no change in where you are. Gradually you will be forced to fade into the increasing masses of people like you.

One has to be well read , well informed and prepared to leap into new challenges if you ever wish to make a difference to your own life and living.

Myself, Prose

This ain’t cool …

There are not many instances that I lose my cool in office. I have cried often when I have performed bad , or felt hurt by some one’s remarks , but never had I replied back in such scenarios. One thing that I absolutely can not let go though is personal insult or allegations. I am not very rigid person but when pitted against some one who only wants to prove his ego the reason for all actions, I have realized I have a bigger ego and stubbornness in such moments , not that I am particularly proud of this.

What I fail to understand and accept is colossal disregard to professional etiquette and more than that , the tendency to NOT follow processes. Processes are there to help people know the best way to deal with any situation and to avoid chaos of any and all kinds. When some one can not respect that , I judge him already. Add to that , the fight to prove himself right in all ways is as much as my flaw , it is unpardonable in people who argue without concern.

I have learned to be gracious and agile with such great effort , and yet breaking that habit becomes a necessity some days. Guess , the lessons are not so much ingrained in me as I thought 😉

Hopefully tomorrow would be a different and better day.

I could so much use some positive vibes to keep my cool next time , I feel like banging my head into a wall or some one who acts like one.

Hope your week going better !

Love,

P

life, my days, Myself, Prose

Goodbye 2015 – part#1

This is not yet a post where I reflect on the year gone by and list the good and bad of it. It is also not yet the time and moment to sort the lessons from the mistakes or make different section of the people you met or let go. This is more about how I want to do all this. How to properly send off 2015 into the portals of my mind wjere it is saved and remembered well for the right reasons.

The first thought was to go alone on a journey and as the cities are left behind, I tick of all the months and weeks of the year gone by. Since that is some luxary I can not afford at the moment ( my medical leaves last month have left me with neither time nor health to travel far ) , I thought of alternatives. The motive is to be alone and relaxed enough to be honest , be objective , bit harsh in scrutiny and kind on yourself equally. The idea is to aporeciate the goodness of life , goodness in yourself and whatever iota you got from people around you. And lastly, the task is to decide what to leave behind in this year itself – mistakes , people , negativity and memories too.

So I thought of having a date with myself next weekend – coffee ,  a diary , a planner for next year and lastly a goid walk alone to reaffirm my proMises and plans.

How are you going to say goodBye to 2015 ?

Prose, random thought

Updates.

So , from last 4 years , I hosted Dec writing challenge where I asked people to sum up the year gone by. This year I had no intention of doing that ( no idea why ) but I sure wanted to revive my blog before the year ends.

A quick update on the last month is that I spent first half of it being sick and the last 10 days recovering from a minor surgery. I am lot better ( and a little lighter 😉 ) from the food my mom been feeding me. and if that is going to be the trend for next 45 days , I am sure I can finally lose some inches 😀

Another reason I wanted to revive the blog was to write – anything and almost everything that comes to my mind. hopefully , you will see some random yet sensible posts till I gain more confidence and readership 😛

Finally, I hope I will visit and read all you awesome people I follow.

More laters !

Stay blessed.

PS : I actually logged in to check out the WP snow balls 😀
PPS: I love them.